Man's Best Friend

Lacking sprogs of my own, I must appropriate others' stories about their delightful offspring for the Internet's amusement.

As will so often be the case, this month's story comes courtesy of my aunt and uncle, Donnahay and Abacus, and my two cousins, Mocky (5) and Melon (3).

It seems both boys have been going through quite the period of penis-holding & fondling & generally mucking around with.

Item 1: Melon comes running out into the lounge room, starkers, hanging on for dear life to his young fella. Abacus says, "Melon, STOP holding it all the time." "Not hold it?" Melon asks. "No, not all the time," replies Abacus. Melon drops it, looks at Abacus and says, with some sorrow in his voice, "Not my friend?"

Item 2: Mocky is luxuriating in the bath and having a good old time with his little buddy and Abacus, once again in a censorious role, says, "Mocky, stop playing with it. Why do you play with it so much?" [At this point, in my mind's eye, Mocky's eyelids flutter, his eyeballs roll up into his head and a little bit of drool slides from the corner of his mouth.] In reality, he simply looked up at his father, his chubby, innocent face full of adoration, and announced, "I just love it!"