Lunching with Boxer Girl and Canned Ham I was worriedly eyeing off The Ham's heaving bosom, threatening to spill forth from her blouse.
"Ham, I'm not perving on you. Do you realise the top button of your shirt's undone?"
"I've got too fat for this top - I'm busting out of it! Do you think anyone's noticed?"
"Don't worry about it. They're an asset - you want them to attract interest."