My retailer of choice...

...when it comes to plastic storage, is Tupperware. The Burp is a Tupperware manager and she sweet-talked me into dealing (pushing) the stuff - I'm not very successful; I don't have the hip lingo down pat and, like all pathetic addicts, I consume way too much of my stash before I hit the streets. I tell you, once you've kept mushrooms fresh for several weeks, you'll never go back to store-bought plastic. And you just want more more MORE!

Grumpy professes despair at the ever-growing mound of Tupperware in the house but he can't fool me. Every time someone comes to visit he will invent an opportunity to whip out the can opener and demonstrate it for them. "Look how smoothly it works!" he'll cry. "Where can I get one?" the mark will ask. Grumpy will coyly point out to them that I am a Tupperware dealer and he'll look the other way while I lead them into another room to complete the transaction. Later he'll beat me with a filled ice cube tray (the seal snugly secured to avoid the hassles of spillage) and take away all my profits, but this is the price you pay when you're living rough.