Did you all enjoy that cliffhanger?
All five of you, that is.
Yes, The Burp broke her arm. And she had to have it operated on. They were going to use a general anaesthetic but didn't bother when she went into a dead faint upon hearing the words, "We're going to have to push that."
The injury occurred during a brutal and thuggish game of netball down in East Fremantle. Some chick, probably sporting a five o'clock shadow, knocked The Burp to the ground and hence the broken bone. The fallout didn't stop there - The Rooster, who was out yahooing it up at the rugby, felt a spousal obligation to tear himself away from the game and be at his wife's side. Luckily they had the game on the TV at the hospital. I mean, phew, eh??
The Burp is somewhat housebound for a week or so, until she can get out of her sling and back behind the wheel. "But this needn't stop me going to the movies!" she said. Again, phew. Without the movies, my social life would be nowhere.
So we trooped off to see Wedding Crashers, which was an amusing enough little diversion for the afternoon. Not as hilarious as I thought it would be, but I had a few chuckles and a few out-loud laughs. Vince Vaughn had all the best lines and I thought his and Isla Fisher's romance was much more interesting than the main love story.
But my attention was really grabbed during the previews when we got to see Jessica Simpson's video for These Boots Were Made for Walking, which I assume is a kind of trailer for The Dukes of Hazzard. In a word: disturbing. Or if you want three words: creepy and disturbing. I felt like I'd stumbled on to some sort of soft porn video, with Jessica frantically wiggling and grinding away, desperately trying to look...well, something. Whatever it was, it wasn't subtle. And her voice was bizarre - whispered and muted; perhaps to cover up the fact she can't sing at all? I don't know. However, despite JS's futile and scary attempt to fill the short shorts of Catherine Bach, the most truly appalling aspect of the whole thing was an appearance by Mr Willy Nelson! Willy Nelson in a soft-porn video masquerading as a bad film of a classically terrible TV series!
Oh, Willy, I know you're probably still paying off a big tax bill, and the greatest of all The Highwaymen is gone, but are things really that bad?
Say it ain't so, Mr Nelson. For me. For all of us.
2 comments:
I am intrigued by your apparent indepth knowledge of soft porn, HBB.
And I must add, that the burp's accident is yet another example of the fact that exercise is bad for one. Short of a heart attack, what harm can befall you while sitting on the couch?
Hope she is feeling better soon.
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