Housework

It causes issues in our house. Mostly because I do so little of it. As I see it, my main role in life is to sit in front of the tv and fart and scratch my balls.

You don't know the half of it.

But my one obsession is the kitchen. Every single bloody night I clean the benches and the stove top and the splashback until all is glistening like gold. Only it isn't gold. Because if it was I'd be writing this blog from a yacht in the Caribbean.

Anyway, the other night I was rubbing Grumpy's feet - and making sure he knew what a huge hassle it was - and I asked him, not for the first time, "Do you ever notice how each night the kitchen is sparkling clean - thanks to me?" And even by the dim glow of the tv, I could see his face was filled with love and compassion and pity as he looked at me and said, "Notice? Of course I notice - every time you point it out to me!"